The role of the family in Lenapé culture is a complex one, because the family is not structured the same way that European families are structured. The European family is patriarchal, which is to say that the blood lineage and family name is passed through the males of the family. The Lenapé family is matriarchal, which is to say that the blood lineage and family identity is passed through the females of the family.
Traditionally, the Lenapé woman was the head of the household. She owned the house and everything in it; the Lenapé male owned only his clothes and his weapons. The women determined the leadership of the village [chiefs and clan mothers], when the village should go to war, and often when certain religious ceremonies would be held.
Family and clan identity were passed through the mother because it often might not be certain who the father of the child was, but the mother was never in question. When a man took a wife, he took her family name and clan, and moved in with her people. When a boy was ready to pass into manhood, it was not his father who gave him training for manhood but his uncle, his mother’s brother.
The clan was central to the Lenapé culture. The clan was an extended family which cooperated in the raising of the children and the activities of the village. The clan was a blood relationship; the other members of your clan were your uncles, aunts, and cousins.
Times have changed. The European culture has eroded our social structures. Those of us who are trying to return to traditional ways as much as is possible in the modern world embrace the matriarchal model for our society. There are aspects of traditional Lenapé family structure which we do not attempt to practice because it would not be well received in our modern surroundings. But we hold the family and clan ties as critical to the survival of our people. A correct understanding of family and clan ties serves to bind our people together tightly to withstand the attacks on our way of life from outside sources.
